This week, the Upper Juniors were writing a story with the title ‘It Wasn’t My Fault’. The children wrote about various disasters included spilling bleach on mum’s favourite blouse and accidentally knocking over an expensive vintage vase whilst attempting to tidy up!
I chose Harry as my Dragon Writer because he really tried hard with his structure this week. He included complex sentences and interesting vocabulary in his description and he had focussed on correctly punctuating his paragraphs on speech.
In Harry’s story, the two characters, Tim and Jane, accidentally break the TV whilst tidying up but they are very honest and admit the accident to mum immediately: if you were Tim or Jane, what would you do if you had unintentionally destroyed the television?
Harry! What a terrific story! I feel really proud to see your writing up on the blog. You very much deserve the Nintento Wii token coming your way! After reading your great idea about a broken TV, I have planned my own story following a similar plotline which I’ll be sharing with my English Team soon. Will it be as good as yours though?! I’m not sure…
WOW! harry fabulous speech you must of worked super hard well done your writing is mind blowing!
Well done Harry , your writing is amazing ! You should be really prod of yourself for achieving PB !Keep up the great work!
Well done Harry,your writing is really good ! Well done for achieving PB (personal best).
Great well done Harry, your writing is really good, well done for geting on the blog!!!!:)
Well done Harry 🙂 for achieving a PB!!:)
WOW ! I love great writing from a hordle learner . 🙂
Harry! I love your tension because it engaged me, as the reader, to carry on! In addition, I really liked that you used so many different pronouns for the children, I thought it was great. However, if I broke a TV, I don’t think my mum would let me off that easily, nor would she just buy a new one because it was in the sale. Saying that, it made a great ending to your story! Well done!
Wow Harry I am so imprest by your handwriting keep it up?I think Miss Cazneaux would be so so happy.
Well done Harry, i bet you are proud of your self you deserve to be on there well done.